Ten Things I Would Tweet If I Was Still On Twitter… Volume Twenty Eight

Broadcasters who put ANY qualifier before the word “unique” should be suspended without pay on the spot.

Can’t watch commercial of the day… Chevy guy throwing eggs at people

The time between an overzealous play by play guy saying quarterback x “has plenty of time” and a sack, flush out or throwaway under pressure is almost always less than a second

I’d still rather be a fan of the 49ers than the Bucs, or the Texans

Duke is, once again, bowl eligible

So NASCAR lets Kevin Harvick stay on the track in a car that won’t run and he causes a crash that wrecks Hamlin and Newman knocking them out of the chase and keeping him in… Cuz it’s NASCAR

The favorite words of the below average lead announcer on nbc’s NASCAR coverage… “THREE WIDE!” even when the cars aren’t

Why weren’t the updated “chase standings” on the screen somewhere the entire last half of the race

I want to thank Michael Breed for making golf fun again for me

I’m curious who the Vice President is going to be

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Ten Things I Would Tweet If I Was Still On Twiiter… Volume Twenty Seven

David Price and the LA Dodgers are a match made in heaven

Colin Kaepernick can still play quarterback, he’s just on the wrong team now

I think this will be a very interesting Academy Awards year

Tom Selleck is cool

Erin Andrews gets worse and worse and worse

Kansas City Royals starting pitchers need hat help and they’re punks

UCLA’s colors are blue and gold so at home against Cal they wore black… Got it (no I don’t)

None of the NFL teams that are undefeated today will be undefeated at the end of December

I won’t be watching the Bills play the Jaguars on yahoo.com Sunday

Dan LeBatard has a very entertaining radio show

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Ten Things I Would Tweet If I Was Still On Twitter… Volume Twenty Six

I hate to admit it but right now I believe Rick Pitino

I think Nashville is the only show where nothing good ever happens to anybody

If the Royals get there I don’t see them winning the World Series with Johnny Cueto and Edinson Volquez

I wish the great Cal Ripken was better on tv

Easy to watch commercial of the day… Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups

Well Chicago that was fun

I think I’ve said this before but why are there paid advertisements on shows exclusively on XM Radio

“Get off the nuclear device” is movie screenplay magic

Baseball is foolish if they don’t start the World Series on Sunday if KC wins Friday

Is Absolute Electrick NOT Absolute vodka?

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Ten Things I Would Tweet If I Was Still On Twitter… Volume Twenty Six

Tell me again why Eli Manning is an elite quarterback?

How many things will Colin Cowherd be wrong about tomorrow?

I wish I could hit a 90 mph fastball a foot let alone 400 feet

My friend Jerry Foltz is in an honest to goodness Hall of Fame member. Good for him

Easy to watch commercial of the day… Navy Federal Credit Union

Our dog likes the cold much more than I do

NFL throwback uniforms should be thrown in the dumpster before the game starts

Joe Buck needs Dollar Shave Club

I’m not sure if I’d rather BE a butler or HAVE a butler

Fall leaves are a lot prettier when they are actually ON the trees

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Ten Things I Would Tweet If I Was Still On Twitter… Volume Twenty Five

I like The Good Wife and The Blacklist because they don’t tell me what happened “previously on The Good Wife & The Blacklist”

Amazing how much less of a genius Joe Maddon is when his players don’t overachieve

Michigan dropping 5 spots in the polls is exactly what’s wrong with the polls

At least for one week the 49ers and the Seahawks have the same record. Take that Seattle fans

Can’t watch commercial of the day… Geico “The Final Countdown” cuz now I’m singing that song

Right now I’d rather be Jerry Seinfeld (Mets fan) than Bill Murray (Cubs fan)

Why does Johnny Cueto take his hat off every time he walks from the mound to the dugout?

How many millions of dollars did Jays pitcher David Price lose in Saturday?

Thanks for 2012 Barry Zito. Enjoy retirement

There is NO way Brock Osweiler plays quarterback for Denver in a game that matters any time soon

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Golf Channel Joins The Meaningless Sports Graphic Parade

It’s official, the PGA TOUR and Golf Channel don’t have a lot of respect for your intelligence. The all golf network just revealed a “brand new” graphic that gives viewers details about putts PGA TOUR players hit, make, and miss during a tournament broadcast.

Golf writer Martin Kaufmann at Golfweek wrote about this “breakthrough”, complete with quotes from folks at GC touting its merit. You can read his excellent, as always, column at http://www.golfweek.com The bottom line is thanks to various computer algorithms and other machinations the viewer is treated to the exact length, as well as the amount and direction each particular putt will break. But BEST of all is the complete fantasy, and direct insult to every golfer’s intelligence, of the third part of the “new” graphic, the “make percentage”. The likelihood that the various, most accomplished players in the world will MAKE the putt.

Nice to know the distance and I’m willing to accept the computers reliability on figuring out the amount and direction of break. After all I was part of the team at The Golf Channel that devised and utilized what has always been the best and most accurate computerized “green reader” in TV golf, Aimpoint. Thanks to some really smart people we generated an actual, superimposed, line on the green that illustrated where the player had to hit the ball to have the best chance of making any putt on the greens we mapped . The viewer could follow the putt along the computer generated line live and know immediately if the ball was going in or not. That was 2007 and it worked, it won what is still the channel’s only EMMY, and they stopped using it. It its place they have now instituted the most irrelevant and unnecessary graphic in the history of televised golf, the “make percentage”. It’s a number for numbers sake and as an informative tool to help advance a story it is useless. It is Golf Channel’s dive into the ever expanding pool of meaningless graphics on sports broadcasts joining, among others, the “unforced” error in tennis and the number of balls and strikes thrown by a pitcher in baseball. Stats that are worse than meaning”less” they, in fact, mean nothing at all.

I have so many questions, dear reader, where to begin? How about here… Do you play golf? Have you ever had the EXACT same putt, more than once, on a green in your entire life? Some 15 foot putts are uphill, some side hill, some downhill. Some are struck early in the morning on dew covered surfaces, some struck late in the afternoon on grass that has grown, even ever so slightly, during the course of the day. Some putts roll on surfaces dotted with spike marks between the origination point and the hole while others are treated to surfaces smooth as glass. Some are hit on bermuda grass, others bent grass and still others on tif dwarf or fescue. Some players employ a cut stroke, some a pop stroke, some an outside in stroke… By now I hope you get the point.

But despite ALL these variables, and so many more, the PGA TOUR in cahoots with Golf Channel expect you educated, golf loving, golf playing men, women, girls and boys to believe that EVERY SINGLE 15 foot putt is exactly the same so they can peddle you a completely phony “make percentage” on a graphic. The greens at Silverado are not the same as the ones at Bay Hill which are not the same as the ones at TPC Deere Run. Jordan Spieth is not the same kind of putter that Jason Day or Matt Kuchar or Brandt Snedeker or Ernie Els or Tiger Woods or Phil Mickelson or Tom Gillis is. Stop insulting our intelligence.

In fact, in Kaufmann’s piece, a Golf Channel spokesperson went so far as to admit how superfluous this latest graphic is by calling it “eye candy”. I don’t know about you but the last thing I want cluttering up my 60 inch, HD screen is words and numbers that don’t do anything to advance the narrative. It was so innovative they hardly ever used it.

Keep the length of the putt and stay with the amount and direction of the break if you like but to keep any semblance of credibility lose the “make percentage”. I, for one, expect more of 2015/2016 technology and I hope you all do too.

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Ten Things I Would Tweet If I Was Still On Twitter… Volume Twenty-Four

Too bad there’s no game five with the Cubs and the Cards because who didn’t want more Brian Anderson

Nobody slides into home better than the Rangers’ Rougned Odor

Will Clayton Kershaw continue to disappoint in the postseason?

Tim Kurkjian really knows his stuff

Cubs taking care of the Cards now we need the Mets to oust the Dodgers. New postseason baseball blood is good

Can’t watch commercial of the day… Jublia toe fungus

If you’re a Republican don’t you want Bernie Sanders to win these Democrat debates?

In case you’re wondering I still think The Golf Channel founder Joe Gibbs belongs in the World Golf Hall of Fame

If you get the chance try Tattoo Tequila

The show Gotham started strange and then got weird

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Funny Name, Fabulous State Park

If you ever find yourself in North Central New Jersey (the pretty part, yes there is a pretty part!) and looking for a place to spend some quality time allow me to suggest Hacklebarney State Park. It’s a perfect spot for a picnic, hike, a little trout fishing, or simply getting back to nature. Perhaps more importantly it’s one of the best places on the planet to take your pooch.

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Located near Chester Township, Hacklebarney State Park is almost 1200 acres of forest featuring, among other plant species, American ginseng, Hemlock, Leatherwood, and Virginia Pennywort all looking down on the flowing, occasionally rushing, waters of the Black River. Numerous trails get you from point A to point B to point C and back again. All are well marked but at times you will be convinced you’ve wandered off the beaten path only to find a blue, red, or yellow painted mark on a tree up ahead telling you to keep putting one foot in front of the next. On some of the trails the task of putting those feet in front of each other can be difficult thanks to rocks, roots, downed trees and narrow passages but others pathways are wide, well marked and easily passable.

It’s all made easier, of course, if you are led along the way by man’s best friend. Our dog has no trouble at all navigating even the most daunting looking trails especially if they lead her to the cool, refreshing waters of the Black River for a drink. Dog or no dog if you wander through Hacklebarney you’ll pass families, friends, fishermen and women, and nature lovers all taking in the sights, sounds, and smells of the park. While there may be hundreds of cars in the parking lot and that many people, or more, in the park you can find yourself alone on certain trails for hundreds and hundreds of yards.

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The park is “carry in, carry out” meaning there are no trash receptacles on the property so everything you have with you when you enter is expected to be with you when you exit. Another thing to keep in mind is that many of the trails feature elevation changes that are sure to elevate your heart rate. It’s all downhill to the Black River which means, of course, it’s straight up the hill to get back to your car but you don’t have to hike all the way down to the river. You can wander along the Rinehart or Trout Brooks (tributaries that feed the river) and enjoy lunch or a snack at one of the dozens of picnic tables (some with accompanying barbecues).

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If your perception of the Garden State is the Newark airport, the Meadowlands or one of the
many exits off the Turnpike I hope you’ll expand your horizons and find your way to Morris County and enjoy an hour, an afternoon or an entire day at Hacklebarney State Park. For more information check out http://www.state.nj.us and click on “Things to do” or google Hacklebarney State Park.

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Ten Things I Would Tweet If I Was Still On Twitter… Volume Twenty-Three

Two straight days NO President’s Cup for me. One question, did the same guys play together again? Thought so

I am a San Francisco Giants fan 365 days a year so today I am a Mets fan

Do they play baseball on cement in Toronto?

Hey Chuck Pagano was Matt Hassleback really “literally” on his death bed? Geez

I’m probably in the minority but Bob Costas bugs me

Can’t watch commercial of the day… State Farm Coneheads

How far away from Colin Cowherd do you have to stand NOT to get spit on?

I didn’t even know Lloyd McClendon WAS the manager of the Mariners

I feel kind of sorry for KC Royals fans counting on Johnny Cueto

I looked up overexposed in the dictionary and saw a picture of Danny Kanell

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Ten Things I Would Tweet If I Was Still On Twitter… Volume Twenty-Two

Does Kenny Albert talk like that when he’s NOT on tv?

It’s either really hard to mix audio in the Rogers Center with the roof closed or the FOX audio guy isn’t very good

How many GM’s in baseball want to pay top dollar for a pitcher who’s a postseason disaster? Except of course the Dodgers GM

I don’t trust anyone who says they’ve never had a drink or a cup of coffee… Except Peter Esposito

Looking forward to watching a football game at West Point Saturday

Can’t watch commercial of the day… Cartoon food talking in the fridge

Don’t think the Blue Jays can win without Josh Donaldson

Didn’t watch one second of the President’s Cup day one matches and it appears I didn’t miss a thing

I hope Rob Oppenheim keeps his PGA TOUR card next year

I think Media Matters guy David Brock and ESPN guy Mel Kiper are the same guy. Have you ever seen them together?

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